Yes they are mortal; even if you had been sniffing all the glue made in the US in the last five years, they were mortal before the Detroit game. And as Boswell notes, injuries to Michael Westbrook are not unknown and after all the stomach acid is pumped and all the hatches are battened down, the bottom line has always been that Westbrook's presence or absence is "pretty close to irrelevant." When he plays, the Redskins are 30-31-1; when he is not playing, they are 9-9.

And if the media and fans here in Washington had even a brief memory, they would recall just last season when Albert Connell said that no one - and particularly not someone named Deion - could possibly cover him and that he could get open every play. Now we also remember that Albert forgot to run out of bounds in the final seconds of a game or a half twice last season costing the team a shot at a field goal or a TD, so we have to discount some of what he said; but now he is the lead receiver and it is time for Albert to step up or shut up. And regarding his mental prowess, let me just say that if the police get a missing person report on him, they need not waste a lot of time staking out the local MENSA chapter.

Kevin Lockett, WR for the Chiefs, was reacting to the story that Gunther Cunningham had thought about resigning after the opening day loss and was talked out of it by his wife. Cunningham has denied this, but who cares. Lockett said that Gunther was just frustrated because "he sees how good we can be".

Memo to Kevin: I looked at the rest of your schedule and I see 6 wins - 8 on the outside if the "Football Fairy" visits you a couple of times to leave miracles under your pillow. You guys can be as good as - uh - break even! After two games, you guys rank 15th in the AFC in defense and 14th in the AFC in offense. The word for that status is "STINKS".

Chris Mullin has been released - at his request - from the Indiana Pacers and he is looking to catch on with another team. Mullin is the definition of a gym rat; this is a guy who lives to play and be around the game of basketball. He is not and never was a great athlete; in fact when he skies for a rebound now, you might not be able to get a credit card under his shoes. But he is a person that can help a young team that needs leadership to make a run at the playoffs or to win a playoff series. I suspect he will catch on somewhere.

Remember when Samaki Walker was arrested after being chased down by the police for riding his motorcycle at over 100 mph? Well, it seems that Samaki has another minor problem to deal with. Evidently, his motorcycle antics were widely enough known that the San Antonio Spurs included a clause in his contract that specifically forbade him from riding one while he was under contract. It will be interesting to see the basis for the grievance filed by the Players Association in this one.

A local high school tennis coach got into the ebullience zone talking about his star player. He said that she was a "smart player who uses her head." Then he said that "she picks and chooses when to hit her winners."

Memos to Coach:
1. If she ever chooses not to hit a winner when she has the chance, she is as dumb as doggy dooty. Tennis does not award style points; it just counts winners. And if you allow her to play that way, you are even dumber.

2. What would be your description of a "smart player" who did not use her head? Might that be a "dumb player"?

1. He was on his way to see his probation officer when he had this "situation". So what happens now, the probation officer comes and makes a house call?

2. Why is driving to a doctor's office different from driving anywhere else? He could "black out" on that journey too and kill someone. If the probation officer can make house calls, why can't his doctor?

3. If he were to go to "work", he would likely try to rejoin the New York Yankees who were his most recent employer. How can he ply his trade as a baseball player and be under house arrest?

Finally, there are three early lines on NFL games this weekend that have me very puzzled. In two of the games, I think the wrong team is favored; in the other, I thought the game would be "pick 'em".

Green Bay minus 4 versus Philly. Packers have looked awful and Favre is still not well. I know it is in Green Bay and I know that Philly should make no plane reservations to go to Tampa next January, but 4 points? It opened at 3.5 and then the spread got bigger! What am I missing here? I really expected a "pick 'em" here.

New England minus 2 versus Minnesota. The spread opened at 1 and went through 1.5 and is now at 2. The Pats can't run the ball and their pass protection is not stellar. Yes, the Vikes are away for the first time this year; and yes, Bellichick will throw complex defenses at the rookie QB. But if I had to pick the winner of the game here, I'd take the Vikes. What is the deal here?

Chicago minus 2.5 versus NY Giants. The spread opened at 1 and is now at 2.5 and the Bears got waxed last week by Tampa and the Giants handled the Eagles. Why won't the Giants win this game?