With all the rain at Wimbledon, the tournament is humongously behind schedule in finishing matches. One count said there was a 63-match backlog as of Wednesday morning. That is bad for the tour organizers but it’s even worse for the British papers who feel compelled to have Wimbledon stories prominently displayed on a daily basis. With all that rain, nothing has been happening on the courts so the London Sun has pursued off-the-court stories for its readers. Here’s one of the things they came up with.
Maria Sharapova announced that she is a fan of James Bond movies. And she said that one of her great aspirations in life is to be one of the James Bond girls in one of those flicks. Leave the story there, and you might have a simple puff-piece that can fill space during a day of rainouts. But no, they had to quote Sharapova too:
“I’m great at spying – I should have been Sherlock Holmes.”
Way back in my youth, I once read the entire series of Sherlock Holmes stories – every last one of them. Even though I don’t remember all of them and would be hard pressed to pass an exam on the trivia of the series, I do recall that Holmes was a detective and not a spy. So, Sharapova’s comment makes about as much sense as my saying:
“I’m great at painting baseboards – I should have been Rosie O’Donnell.”
The Chicago Rush is the city’s Arena Football league entry. As with just about every indoor sports team these days, the Rush have a dance team. [Aside: Did I miss the debate in Congress that led to a law mandating these dance teams for all indoor sports?] I manage to ignore most of these things, but I do have to admit that the name of the dance team in Chicago is clever. They call the dancers The Adrenaline Rush.
The Orlando Magic has a commitment from Rashard Lewis to a five-year “max deal” under the NBA salary cap rules. But they can’t sign him for a week and the Sonics still have the option of giving him a six-year “max deal”. So, don’t write him onto the Magic roster in India ink just yet; remember the Magic actually did sign a coach to a contract and that only lasted about 36 hours…
A month or so ago, I had some nice things to say about MLS and got excoriated because I had the audacity to say that David Beckham might be over the hill and that he hadn’t actually played in any MLS games so far this year. Many folks referred me to the MLS press conference at Beckham’s signing saying he would not be here until a month after his contract ran out with his European club. Well, that month has passed and he’s still not playing. Latest word is he will make his first appearance in an LA Galaxy game in late July – - in an exhibition game against a European team and not against an MLS opponent. And there have been rumors – all of which were denied of course – that he has an “out clause” in his MLS contract. Let me say two things about the “out clause debate”:
1. Its existence would prove pretty conclusively to me that the $250M figure on that contract is fictional.
2. When all is said and done, who really cares if the clause is there or not? The “out clause” only matters if it exists AND it is exercised. If it were exercised, then we would know for sure that it existed…
And speaking of the LA Galaxy, their General Manager is Alexi Lalas – the former defender on the US National Team. In a recent spasm of hyperbole, Lalas said that when David Beckham arrived in LA he would become larger in stature than Tiger Woods and/or Michael Jordan. The two operative words to respond to that prediction would be: “Not Happening”. I don’t know if MLS tests its athletes for performance enhancing substances and don’t really care. I do think they might consider a testing program for MLS front office personnel regarding the use of hallucinogens, however.
Here’s a positive note about MLS. AEG used to own six or seven of the teams in the league creating in political terms “the appearance of a conflict of interest”. They now own three of the teams in the league; and reportedly, a deal to sell the Chicago Fire to local investors/owners is near completion. If that deal closes, that would leave AEG with only the LA Galaxy and the Houston Dynamo under its control. That leaves only one final step to take…
In the midst of the college basketball season, Pokey Chatman resigned as the coach of the LSU women’s team. The resignation came on the heels of a charge from one of the assistant coaches that Chatman and one of the players had engaged in “inappropriate conduct/contact”. At the time, I said that we needed to know lots more about the facts of the case before making any judgments about Ms. Chatman. Now, we do know that she received a $160K settlement from LSU in the matter. She also received the full $85K “post-season bonus” that was in her contract since the team did make the NCAA tournament and did advance. Some reports say the $85K was included in the $160K settlement; other reports say the $85K was on top of the $160K; whatever.
Now imagine for a moment that a male coach at a major basketball school had to resign under similar circumstances. Let me pose a couple of questions:
1. Do you think that male coach could have disappeared from view and received no national scrutiny for about 5-6 months? Please recall the Larry Eustachy saga regarding his inappropriate contact/conduct – and that wasn’t with one of his players.
2. If that male coach got a sizeable settlement – virtually what his contract called for him to make if he worked – under the same circumstances, would that be reported as a factual matter and left alone?
3. If Title IX is supposed to generate equality between the sexes in college athletics, shouldn’t it require equal coverage of alleged inappropriate coach/player contact? Remember Bob Knight’s “inappropriate contact” with Neil Reid? Just asking…
Last fall, Western Carolina paid a November visit to Gainesville Florida to get whomped by the Florida Gators in a game that should not have been scheduled in the first place. I’m too lazy to go and look up the exact score, but I remember that Western Carolina was shut out in the game and lost by more than 50 points. Looking at college football schedules for this year, Western Carolina will visit Alabama on September 1 and they will visit Georgia on September 15.
Memo to Western Carolina Athletics Department: You are in the Division 1-AA Southern Conference not the SEC – in case you hadn’t noticed.
Finally, July 4th is the date for the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest – or whatever it’s called. Champion Takeru Kobayshi was a “game time decision” regarding his entry in the event due to a medical condition. Here’s what Greg Cote had to say about that in the Miami Herald:
“Competitive-eating champion Takeru Kobayshi is sidelined by an arthritic jaw. Seriously. What? You mean repeatedly jackhammering 53 hot dogs into your maw within 12 minutes puts stress on one’s facial hinge? No way.”
But don’t get me wrong, I love sports…