The Opening Ceremonies for the Olympics are tomorrow. The US women’s soccer team played its first game yesterday against Norway and lost 2-0. What part of “opening ceremonies” is so difficult to understand?
Senator Sam Brownback of Kansas has gotten his knickers in a knot and claims to have “documented evidence” that the Chinese government will subject the media, the athletes, their families and other visitors to “invasive intelligence gathering” during the Olympic Games. [Just for fun, what might be “non-invasive intelligence gathering”? Just asking…]
Cut back on the caffeine Senator; the day that the IOC awarded the games to China, all of these activities were a foregone conclusion. I hope no one tells the Senator that some Internet sites are blocked and members of the press there will not have access to all of their Internet resources while they are there. If someone tells the Senator that, he may start to orate about the First Amendment – - which does not exist in China. Oh, and everyone should have known that too back when the IOC awarded the games to China several years ago.
I also read that there is a sex-determination laboratory set up at these Games. The purpose of this facility is to assure that individuals competing in women’s competitions are in fact – - women. In situations where there is doubt about the “birth-gender” of a competitor, there will be “external examinations” and then four different “genetic/hormonal tests”. I guess this is what we call progress…
Bob Molinaro had an interesting comment on drug testing procedures for these Olympic Games in the Hampton Roads Virginian-Pilot:
“Idle thought: Anticipating drug-related controversies at the Summer Games doesn’t make you a cynic, just a student of history.”
In the baseball world, the Yankees put Joba Chamberlain on the DL after he had to come out of a game with shoulder soreness. This raises an interesting question:
Will Joba need to have Dr. Frank Jobe do a job on him?
Interestingly, I have not read even a short fulmination from Yammering Hank Steinbrenner about this injury. Let’s see, he can’t blame this one on the NL not having the DH rule. Moreover, it was his insistence that the Yankees make Joba Chamberlain into a starting pitcher instead of a reliever so that put extra mileage on Joba’s arm this year. Hmmm… Gotta find someone to blame here … It must be the fault of all those ne’er-do-wells in Red Sox Nation; yeah, that’s it…
Earlier this week, Brandon Webb won his 16th game of the season. He is the first pitcher in MLB to do that this year. More interestingly, that win came in a game that was played in one hour and fifty-five minutes. Bad night for the beer vendors there…
I wonder if the NFL is reading these essays and taking my advice about treating fans better and making the games more enjoyable for them. Probably not. Nevertheless, just a few days after I suggested improvements to the NFL regarding the way they treat fans, the league announced a code of conduct for fans designed to make the game day experience friendlier and more enjoyable. Spectators who misbehave will be ejected from stadiums and if the miscreant behavior is sufficiently bad, they will not be allowed to come again. Here are just some of the things the NFL wants stopped:
Unruly, disruptive or illegal behavior.
Drunkenness resulting in irresponsible behavior.
Foul/abusive language and/or obscene gestures.
Verbal or physical harassment of fans from an opposing team.
Let me assume for just a moment here that the NFL is actually serious about all of this and actually moves to enforce these rules stringently. If that is the case, here is one logical conclusion:
The Philadelphia Eagles and the Oakland Raiders could well be playing to completely empty home fields by Thanksgiving.
The Packers offered Brett Favre somewhere between $20 -25M to stay retired and be part of a club marketing program. Let’s call this what it is – - a severance package. [And the line between a “severance package” and a “bribe for civility” is a fine line indeed…] Forget whether or not you would take such a severance package; of course you would. I think that fans in other NFC North cities are probably thinking that if all those teams came up with a total of $25M they might be able to get the following people to take the same deal and retire:
Rex Grossman, Kyle Orton, Caleb Hanie, Nick Hill, Tarvaris Jackson, Gus Frerotte, Brooks Bollinger, John David Booty, Jon Kitna, Dan Orlovsky and Drew Stanton.
Here is a Quick Quiz:
Who went from “hero status” to “jackass status” in the least amount of time?
a. Floyd Landis
b. Roger Clemens
c. Brett Favre.
100 words or less…
Finally, here is a comment from syndicated columnist, Norman Chad, regarding the NBC Olympics telecasts on myriad TV networks and online:
“I believe my microwave oven will be carrying synchronized swimming most of next week.”
But don’t get me wrong, I love sports…