Now that we have learned that Terrell Owens is writing a children's book, I need to ask all of the potential buyers of that book a simple and direct question:

Which ones of the important life lessons that children need to understand in order to become functional and contributing adults in our society would you want them to learn from Terrell Owens? How to share? How to assist others in their times of need? How to be a solid and loyal friend? How to use medications wisely?

I am never in favor of book burning. In the case of T.O.'s book, I might wish that the truck shipping the volumes from the publisher to the distribution point would be hijacked and driven off to Never-Never Land. There is no way that this can be a literary oeuvre of any importance.

Speaking of Terrell Owens, let me only observe that the Philadelphia Eagles and Donovan McNabb have not collapsed like pricked balloon since he left town. I am not demeaning Owens' abilities as a wide receiver; I have said and continue to believe that he is an exceptional wide receiver - perhaps the best in the NFL and certainly one of the top five. But the Eagles' team has managed to get along without him; Donovan McNabb averages more than 320 yards passing per game in spite of Owens' playing in another venue. Meanwhile, T.O. is not in the top ten in the NFC in terms of receiving stats so far this year; Nevertheless, he must be happy because he's playing with a QB who is clearly better than the one in the situation he found himself in last year.

One final note about T.O., here is a note that was written to the sports editor of the Las Vegas Review-Journal regarding Owens' alleged suicide attempt a couple of weeks ago:

"I hear they're going to file criminal charges against [Terrell Owens] for attempting suicide. The problem is they can't decide whether or not to charge him as an adult."

After watching the Monday night game, I came away very impressed with Bart Scott as a linebacker for the Ravens. I did not remember him as a college player but with a name as common as Bart Scott, I figured that I probably would remember him if I jostled my memory. Well, that didn't work; I didn't remember him as a college player because there's no way I would have seen him. Scott was an undrafted free agent out of Southern Illinois. Now he's part of what is arguably the best trio of linebackers in the NFL. Scouting is as much an art as it is a science.

There was something else going on during the Denver/Baltimore game on Monday night that I missed - and presumably you did too. Thanks to Jim Armstrong in the Denver Post we can now know:

"What, you thought the worst move Monday night was Steve McNair challenging Champ Bailey in the end zone? Not even close. According to my spies in the stands, an overtrained fan with an orange wig and a painted face vomited on cops as they were arresting him…"

The Minnesota Vikings are on their bye week. Last year, the bye week didn't turn out so well for the Vikes; that's when their own Love Boat cruise on Lake Minnetonka set sail. And given what happened there it's pretty clear that everyone was working hard on their scoring. This year, the Vikings really ought to spend the extra time working on their offense; they aren't scoring points on the field and that will hurt them in the standings more than not scoring on imported "escorts". You may recall in the opening game that Brad Johnson looked like an All-Pro against the Washington Redskins. In the week following that game, there were lots of people observing that he was the lowest paid veteran starting QB in the league and that he deserved a big raise. You may also have noticed that kind of talk has died down.

Since the opening game, Johnson has looked more like mild-mannered Clark Kent than Superman. The Vikings are averaging less than 18 points per game. When you subtract two defensive TDs last week against the Lions and a TD on a fake field goal earlier this year - wasn't that against the Panthers? - the Vikings offense averages 13.5 points per game. Even the best defensive teams in NFL history would struggle under those circumstances.

Another QB who is struggling this year is Ben Roethlisberger. I'm more than willing to cut him a lot of slack because he is a Super Bowl winner and he has had a couple of traumatic events in his life since that Super Bowl win in February. Instead of blasting him for throwing seven INTs in his three games this year while also throwing exactly zero TDs, I want to explain why I think he is struggling. Last year, the Steelers' running game and the Steelers' defense dominated games. Roethlisberger only had to throw 22 times a game and defenses always had to defend the run first. So far this year, the Steelers' defense is eighth in the AFC and the Steelers' running game is tenth in the AFC. The result of those two statistical declines is that Ben Roethlisberger is now throwing the ball 34 times a game. When a defense can force an offense to throw that often, the defense can play pass defense first and foremost against more than a few of those throws. And that is why I think Ben Roethlisberger is struggling this year.

The NFL is down to two unbeaten teams and so I have a real and curmudgeonly reason to root for the Super Bowl to be a Chicago/Indy confrontation. No, it is not because I'm some kind of front-running bandwagon-riding fanboy. There's a real reason behind it. The only way for the Bears and Colts to meet in that game is for both teams to be 18-0 going into the game. That would mean that one of the teams would have to leave the game at 19-0; that would finally and completely get the attention-whores on the 1972 Miami Dolphins team to shut up. And, they'd have two full weeks of the media asking them for the final time how it feels to be an undefeated team that would now be rendered to footnote status. If I find a magic lamp and a genie grants me three wishes, that will probably be one of them.

Here is a public service announcement. Today is International Moment of Frustration Scream Day. My long-suffering wife looks forward to this day every year.

Finally, some words of wisdom from syndicated columnist, Norman Chad:

"Sports radio, reflecting our sinking culture, spends entire days advising managers and coaches, berating managers and coaches, firing managers and coaches, and searching the countryside for better middle relievers. If they just redirected their energy toward, say, crosswalk-signal maintenance, America would be 2 percent more livable."

But don't get me wrong, I love sports...

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